Brain damage-amage-amage-amage-amage


Thus far 2022 has been stressful, because I’ve been losing weight non-stop (a problem you think you want until you actually have it happen to you), my electrolyte and other blood levels are everywhere but where they should be, I’m tired all the time (the few times I rely on caffeine via a latte or a caffeine pill barely makes a difference) but I can’t get a good night’s rest even if my life depended on it (again, supplementation, this time via OTC and even RX sleep meds barely make a difference), and then last week, out of nowhere, with naught but about 90 seconds of feeling “off” (sort of like a pre-migraine aura, only intensified) and like my brain was out of sync with my body, I had a fucking GRAND MAL SEIZURE. No, I didn’t stutter. No, you didn’t mis-read. One second I standing up after checking the water level of a drinking fountain I keep under my side of our bed. The next thing I know I’m lying on my floor looking up at my ceiling, Daniel, Alyssa, a cat or two, and two EMTs, and I’m being told I just had a seizure (Daniel had to tell me this four times, because I kept lapsing in and out of consciousness – he said my look of terror each time broke his heart). It lasted for about a minute, during which my eyes were rolled back in my head and my throat was locked up. It was Ryan who found me, and his panicked cry that woke Dan. From a friend and our cat rescue and fostering he knows what a grand mal seizure looks like and what to do, so he was calm and quick about calling 911, calming Ryan, and rolling me to my side and keeping me from injuring myself (further) and being there for me as I came out of it. Besides the seizure, I managed to crack my head on the dresser on the way down – the bruise is still sore, and that injury is now a week and two days old!

Two days of hospitalization for observation, one MRI, two EKGs, and 10 tubes of blood later, I have no answers: just more questions and more frustration and a lot more fear. 😧


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